Rain and Pour: *the longest post ever*

Rain: The Storm

WOW. This has been the roughest week I can remember in some time. My older son was jumped on by another student on Monday, right in the middle of class. He noticed that the test he was turning in for his neighbor (with his own) had some answers blank, and stopped in his tracks as he walked to the teacher’s desk with both tests in hand. The other child accused him of trying to steal his BLANK answers, got out of his seat, and punched my son 3x in the ear before my son could even defend himself. Of course, the teacher hauled them both to the office and the other child was suspended, but do you think the school even gave me a call??? Of course not… they’re too ghetto. Now let that have been my lil terrorist son hitting another child and they’d have called my house, the cell, and the old job too had I not answered. They’re so janky, I hate ‘em.

So anyway, my son ends up being teased the rest of the day in class, wherever he went in the school, and it carried over the whole bus ride home. My lil son sees his big brother getting upset and starts telling the kids to shut up before his brother beats them up. He doesn’t hear Big Brother telling him to hush, until Big Brother snaps and chokes him. So in walk my 2 sons, both crying, telling me what happened. Older son has a nervous breakdown before my eyes, hyperventilating and all, trying to tell me he doesn’t even know why he choked his brother other than that he had such a horrible day. So I get him to take deep breaths until he can tell me about it. Once I hear it, I can do nothing but hold and comfort him, assuring him that the buck stops here. He apologizes to his brother and they exchange I love you’s with an embrace that made me proud. Normally they’re tryna kill each other, so that pic was worth a thousand words, feel me???

Later, I cried to my girlfriend on yahoo about it, how it does notttttt make sense for a 10-y.o. child to be coming home depressed, bullied, and not having even one friend in school. To be quite honest, I think my son is like a mark there because he was raised in church, was in a private Christian school in a church for kiddygarden and 1st grade, is articulate, and has manners. He also was taught not to fight unless necessary, and for a long time he wouldn’t defend himself. Hadda get Dad on the case about that last spring and now my son has a helluva jab, but the other kids haven’t seen it because he was with Dad all summer. I have no doubt that had the teacher not broken it up so quickly, all the teasing would be over coz that lil badass probably would be missing a tooth or 2.

Pour: The Blessings

So the next day, I keep them out and we go to a new community school that’s run by a church, yet still part of our public school system. They have openings!!! We spent the last 2 days getting them enrolled. Tomorrow will be their first day. The spirit of the environment and staff is warm and inviting. I never heard a teacher yelling at the students, like I did with the other school. They wear uniforms and the children are verrrrry orderly. They discipline with after-school detentions and Saturday school. This school is also more advanced, and the boys had to complete assessments to enroll. My older one tested into 5th grade as he should, but my younger one has to drop back to their more advanced kindergarden instead of 1st grade. The 1st graders in this school can already read. I’m not happy about the drop, but I already felt his school wasn’t teaching on an appropriate level. I’m confident my son will be able to read within the next 2-3 months. And don’t think that I haven’t tried to push him along on my end, coz I have. I find that with such elementary building blocks, I have a really, really hard time explaining things to him in a way that he can understand. Once he can at least read, I think I’ll be able to effectively do more. He’s actually very smart, but my explanations suck hot bricks, so once he has a lil more under his belt I’m confident that he’ll be back in the grade he’s supposed to be, even if it takes a year or more. My main qualm is telling his dad, coz he’s notttttttt gonna be happy that I switched him in the first place, so I can already hear his voice screaming.

Anyhoo, I come home yesterday, jump on yahoo and update my girlfriend. Told her they even gave me a letter to take to an agency that has provided uniforms for many of their students. A sista is maddd broke right now with no job, a car down, and inconsistent child support on one child. I won’t be ashamed, coz we all go thru sometimes. Keep telling myself that everything in Life is a SEASON… and just as seasons come, they have to GO!!! Well, my girl being the angel in disguise that she is, insists on purchasing the boys 2 uniforms apiece. Now lemme really make it clear why I call her an angel: this is a friend that I’ve known for about a year online. We’ve only met in person once, but I can’t waitttt to get back out east again to hang with her. My sons dug up old uniforms, and most pieces they have still fit the younger one at least. The older one came up with one. I told her we can make due with these until the agency gives us the vouchers in 2-3 wks. Still, she insisted on buying enough for them to have 3 complete uniforms in the meantime, including their ties, belts, and gym shoes. Then she calls me back afterwards and tells me that the change back was the exact amount of something else she knew I had to pay, so she was including that as well. She said she figures she has one heaven point locked in a chest somewhere, and this might earn her another one. Bwaaaaaahahahhahhahaaaaaaa, that nut!!! I swear, she had me cryin coz sometimes I wonder how I got blessed with such awesome and caring friends. It’s funny how the folks closest in your life are usually the ones who let you down, and the ones the farthest away will help you stand and hold things together. This isn’t the first time she’s done something like this for me either, and I am soooooo looking forward to the day that things are stable and caught up enough to be able to do something awesome for her, too. In the meantime, I thank and trust God to keep her, and multiply those blessings back to her until I can do something on my own.

We also have to purchase t-shirts with the school logo for their gym class, which I didn’t have the money for today. Bless the Lord, my son’s teacher and one of the administrators bought them each a shirt, and told me not to worry about it. Almost started crying right there. Trusttt, when I get a job, those men are gonna get that money back, even though they didn’t do it with expectations. They did it because they knew I’m presently unemployed, and I asked if the boys could wear plain white t-shirts for gym until I get the next child support check. I pray for those blessings to be multiplied back to these men, as well… And on a side note, my 5th grader will only have 14 other kids in his class, with 2 teachers… both male. How cool is that???!! He excelled under a male teacher before, so I’m super happy.

Next, it turns out that the school is in dire need of an administrative assistant/secretary. The first one they had transferred to a middle school the 2nd week of school. They narrowed the search to 3 good candidates, and one fell through already. Presently, they’ve pulled a teacher from the class rotation and have him working in the office until they decide between the other 2, who both have to give 2-week notices upon an offer. He had me bring my resume and references, printed them for me, and said he will be keeping me in prayer for the job, no matter what it looks like right now. Then I ran into another employee, who turns out to be a high school friend I haven’t seen in years. Lastly, another employee is the wife of a pastor whose ministry I sat in for a season. She said they’ve kept us in their prayers since they saw us last. Both old friends will be praying that the door opens for that job to be mine. Working there would have me close to the boys all day, on the same schedule as them, and negate the need for childcare. It’s not far from home, on the busline until the car gets fixed, and maybe a 10-minute drive once my wheels are back. I’d also prayed awhile back to work with a church again, or in a school office. I hope this is my blessing... Please keep a sista in prayer on this, aiight??? *Hugs and thanks to each one of you in advance*

Next, my son’s counselor told me that because my income is so low right now, she wants to make a referral to a program here that provides furniture. I have furniture, *lol*. NICE furniture, at that. I wasn’t always broke, believe that, *lol*. What I don’t have right now is a mattress for my older son’s bunk, coz my lil terrorist tore all the stuffing out of his brother’s while I’ve been out of work. So they share a bunk, which means that they punch and kick each other instead of going to sleep when they’re supposed to. I also just gave away my entertainment stand in the living room because it was so big, it completely limited how I could arrange things in my last 4 apartments. I was sickkkk of it!! Yanno scorps gotta change stuff all the time, *lol*. So tomorrow she will be making a referral for the boys to get new mattresses, most likely an entertainment stand, and a few lamps. PRAISE GOD!!!

Lastly, I’ve had an unresolved legal issue hanging over me for almost 2 years now. I got a hookup with an attorney’s office, and the case was filed for me Friday. Got the copy in the mail today. Not only are they doing it pro bono, but they also petitioned the court for my filing fee to be waived. The case being successfully filed Friday means that the waiver was approved, too. Again, PRAISE GOD!!!

Now… you may be thinking to yourself, “I can’t believe this chick just told all her business like that!!!” Trust, this isn’t all of it. 2005 has been one struggle, one false start after another. The Word says, “We overcome by the blood of the Lamb, and the WORD OF OUR TESTIMONY.” So yes, I’m telling it coz in the midst of the storm, I still have to give God his glory. As flawed as I am, inside there is still a heart that beats for God. Yall have noooooo idea the struggles I’ve seen in different seasons. There’ve been times of amazing feast and times of famine. I never thought I’d again see a year where things were so rough, but through it all, God has provided. A year ago, my engine blew on the freeway while I was looking for a job. Long story short, the car was towed and eventually trashed by the city. Two months later, I had an encounter with someone through my sons’ school who met me once and decided she wanted to see my get back on my feet. A week later she calls and asks permission to adopt our family for Christmas. Gratefully, I accepted, because Christmas was 3.5 weeks away and no job offer was on my horizon. My sons have been raised to understand the true reason we celebrate CHRISTmas, but of course they’re children and still expect gifts. She calls me the week before the holiday, informing me that not only had she and her brother purchased gifts for the children, but they had a surprise for me as well. Her brother works in advertising and PR, and had a lotta connects. They’d called around and found a car dealership that was willing to DONATE a car to me in exchange for some free publicity on the most popular radio station here. Not only did they let him pick out the car himself, but he in turn gave me $500 to pay up the insurance. She picked me up the Monday before Christmas, drove me to the dealership, and I found that the dealership, also had bought Christmas for the children. I drove home in my new ’97 Ford Taurus, silver, fully-loaded with a sunroof, and a trunk full of toys and school supplies. It’s gorgeous and I couldn’t believe it could be that clean and still used. They even took care of the taxes on the car, and the title was in my hand in less than a week. While I was there, a man from a towing company came with 4 vouchers for free tows, gasoline fill-ups, etc., to bless us if any emergencies occur. PRAISEEEEEEEEE GOD!!! For each blessing, I’ve asked God to multiply it back to every person who played a part.

So yesssssssss… I will tell it. I will shout it from the mountaintops, that no matter whattt your condition, it does not dictate your POSITION before God. Somebody betta hear me… He is AWESOME!!! I’ve never had a day that I felt a need to steal, trick out, or compromise my integrity as a woman to provide for my sons. I’m not on public assistance, either. We’ve never gone a day without food, never had a utility cut off, never been without nice clothing. When I catch the bus, my student ID serves as a bus pass, so I don’t pay for that either… even though I’m not even in school. Sometimes we get so focused on wants, it can be easy to lose sight of all the ways that He’s truly paving the way. I’m sharing because the way He takes care of me, He will provide for others. He's no respecter of persons... If you’re in need of anything, pour your heart out to Him in prayer. Believe for it and thank Him in advance. Wait with expectancy… Your blessing may not be the same as mine, but it will be on-point, and probably more than you’d hoped for… Never limit your blessings!!! Never limit God!!!

Today I am encouraged, despite the struggle. I hope my testimony will be an encouragement to someone who needs it. We ALL do at times. My prayer now is to get my brake fixed, and to land a job soon. And I just believe in God’s lovingkindness enough to ask for one that I’ll enjoy, where I can grow/advance, and where the stress will nottttttt be commensurate with the paycheck. Amen??? I can believe on His promises for things that may seem crazy to others, but I guess that’s why it’s called the Gift of Faith. One thing He’s shown me time and time again…

When the troubles RAIN… His blessings POUR!!!